The Chicago 2016 decision will final reach its apex in a mere 7 days and 15 hours. Or so the Countdown To The Decision tells me.
On that note, here is humourous, well-written email I recieved second-hand…good stuff…
Dear International Olympic Committee
When you meet in Copenhagen on October 2nd to determine to location of the 2016 Summer Olympics and Paralympics, I’ll ask that you keep the following in mind re: Chicago’s bid.
First and foremost, we. kick. ass. We are ballers. We are juggernauts of sport, commerce and leisure. We suck the marrow out of life and piss excellence. Our hospitality and generosity will leave you in awe.
We have over 200 annual parades and our 77 distinct and thoroughly amazing neighborhoods include 27 miles of breathtaking beaches. We have the world’s largest outdoor food festival with cuisine from every imaginable culture on the face of Planet Earth. We have the world’s longest avenue and Chicago is the second largest Polish city in the world after Warsaw. Our city library is the largest in the world. We invented roller skates, the skyscraper, Playboy, Twinkies, Crackerjacks, the sustained nuclear chain reaction, and McDonalds. We have hosted two World’s Fairs and reversed an entire river. We are American as apple pie. Hell, we probably invented that too.
We are proud that the first Chicagoan was half French, half Haitian – Jean Bapstiste Point DuSable – lending credit to our incredible history as being part of France, Great Britain, and yes, Connecticut. Enjoy our jazz and blues. Let Lollapalooza BLOW YOUR MIND. Watch an entire river be dyed green, and then praise Gospel Fest until your soul aches. Go ahead and soothe that soul with God’s gift to humanity – deep dish pizza.
We are proud of the fact that in no other city, and in no other country, could the story of the current leader of our Great Republic be told. Or Oprah’s. Or Jordan’s. Ditka, Sweetness and the Fridge are GODS and constitute, in our minds, the fourth great Western religion. Come to Soldier Field and fall down on your knees in worship. Let your tears of joy and wonder trickle down Lake Shore Drive and soak into our farms and fields that feed half of humanity.
We have the 4th largest GDP of all world cities (http://www.skyscrapercity.com/showthread.php?t=454910) and are consistently ranked as an Alpha world city (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Global_city). The breadth and sure awesomeness of our ethnic and religious diversity is matched only by our fucking phenomenal architecture, world renowned museums and vaunted halls of higher education. Illinois doesn’t have mountains. So we built some. We are the crossroads of an entire continent. New Englanders, New Yorkers, Germans, Poles, Finns, Swedes and the Irish laid the groundwork for what would become one of the most diverse cities in the history of mankind.
Daniel Burnham summed up the spirit of Chicago best: “Make no little plans. They have no magic to stir men’s blood and probably themselves will not be realized.” In short, go big or go home. We are, as Carl Sandberg said:
Hog butcher for the world,
Tool maker, stacker of wheat,
Player with railroads and the Nation’s freight handler,
STORMY, HUSKY, BRAWLING,
City of big shoulders.
Give us a shot, IOC, and you won’t be disappointed. Illinois is Algonquin for “tribe of superior men,” and we tend not to disappoint. We’ll even overlook the fact you awarded us the Olympics in 1904, only to change your minds and give it to St. Louis.
To all my FIBs and Flatlanders, embrace your unabashed, unparalleled BIRTHRIGHT to be the most bombastic, bellicose, unwavering supporters of your city. Copy, paste and tag this. Spread the word like a PRAIRIE FIRE that would make Mrs. O’Leary’s cow jealous.
James C. O’Connell